On a (lobster) roll!

Today is my two week layoffiversary and what better way to celebrate than by crossing #39 off the 40 by 40 list: Cook a lobster.

By the way, I didn't wake up counting the days since I'd been laid off, I remembered it when the dental hygienist innocently asked me about work. Still, once I realized it, I enjoyed my midday, sunshiney walk around the lake with a friend just a little bit more. Add in my husband getting the night off from work, and it was time to cook some lobsters!

Maybe the way I worded this one is confusing because I think I really wanted to experience killing a live lobster, not just cooking any old lobster. In retrospect, I guess that's sort of morbid, but it seemed like an experience anyone who likes to cook should have. Just like the pie, I wanted to know that I could do it.

So we located the nearest grocer selling live lobsters and watched as our two were fished out of tank and put in a bag...then we watched that bag wriggle around all the way home.

This recipe in Bon Appetit was my catalyst for deciding that this was the month the lobster would be cooked, and the printed magazine also included a handy dandy guide to killing a lobster, which is where I learned the tip to put them in the freezer for 15 minutes to anesthetize them first. (Truth be told, they didn't seem all that sleepy after even 20 minutes in the freezer, but in my mind they had fewer feelings that way...)

I'm sorry, lobster. I'm going to slice you in half now.

If you've never held a live lobster, you might not realize that they're kind of gross. Like giant insects with claws...giant, wet insects with claws. But I gritted my teeth, and followed the instructions. This recipe was for grilling the lobster, so I had to hold the squirmy things down and cut them in half...alive. Which seemed better than hearing them scream in the boiling pot of water, right up until I was actually plunging the knife into them.

Pleasant is not a word I would use to describe that experience. They wiggled around the entire time. Also, lobster shells are very tough and I had to have my husband help me get the knife all the way through. And they were still twitching even after they were completely cut in half.

Then, I got the things open and had to scrape out the tomalley and eggs...

Sweet dreams are not made of this.

Are you horrified yet? No? How about if I told you that they were still twitching when I put them on the grill? Shudder.

But now comes the more glamorous part.

Gorgeous, right?!

This is why you pay the big bucks to eat lobster in restaurants...you want to get on the lobster bus right about here.

The grilling was simple. 6 minutes meat side down, flip, 3 minutes, done. And then we got...

Ta-da! I'm amazing!

So we ate like kings. Well, we ate the two lobsters. (I think you probably should buy one lobster per person...file that away for your next lobster party.)

Traumatic killing experience aside, it was fucking delicious. And I'm proud of myself. Goodbye, #39! You've taught me that unless I am trapped on lobster island, where live lobsters are my only food source, I can happily go through the rest of my life without doing that again!